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The Toilet-Scrubbing Diaries

7 Jan

Ever so often (in a perfect world – weekly), the glamorous life of rocking my baby and eating bonbons must come to a halt in order to do one gruesome chore…clean the bathrooms. In our last two apartments, we only had one bathroom, so a quick spruce up took all of about five minutes and a full on clean took about ten or fifteen. Now, we have two and a half bathrooms, so I get to spend nearly an hour marching around with my cleaning supplies scrubbing toilets. Don’t get me wrong, I honestly don’t mind housework. The dishes don’t bother me one bit, and I down-right enjoy doing laundry, but cleaning bathrooms is my housewife kryptonite.

Anyway, I’d gotten a little lazy with my bathroom cleaning schedule with the holidays and running into some sort of cold/flu illness. Needless to say, it had been a little while (cough cough – a month, yikes!). Trust me, my mother taught me better than that. So this week, I begrudgingly gathered my cleaning supplies and set off while Titus took a nap. As I was cleaning, I had a variety of thoughts and I decided to jot them down in a stream of consciousness sort of manner, which I have fondly dubbed The Toilet-Scrubbing Diaries. (It was going to be just The Toilet Diaries, but I didn’t want it to sound like I wrote them while actually using the toilet…but I digress.) I guess I should take this time to note that Jeremy uses the second full bathroom to get ready in the mornings so he doesn’t wake up Titus and I. It’s basically just “his” bathroom.

Ugh, I wonder if everybody hates cleaning bathrooms as much as I do.
Where does all this dust come from?
I don’t know why Jeremy bought that one-ply toilet paper, but he can use it himself.
I wonder if I never cleaned Jeremy’s bathroom if he would ever notice.
Why doesn’t he throw away the empty mouthwash bottle?
How many diapers did we get in that trash can? New record, I think.
I wonder why Jeremy doesn’t throw away his razor caps.
Why does he have four razor caps and only one razor?
There’s no toothbrush holder in this bathroom, how does Jeremy live like this?
Should I clean the shower that no one uses? Nah.
Do guys ever actually hit the water when they pee?
Dang, I forgot the glass cleaner for the mirrors. I’ll just come back. Nah.
Man, we have a lot of hair care products and body washes in the shower. (There’s 9)
Finally done! Victory! Now I want to be the first one to use the clean shower. 

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2014 in a Nutshell

6 Jan

Well, more than a year after my most recent post, I’m back. This past year has been a doozy, so I’ll do a turbo recap of 2014 to get myself back on track.

January:

Jeremy and I packed up our second apartment and geared up for a deployment, which for me, meant moving home for a while and resuming a job I had left when we got married. In the midst of that, we found out we were pregnant…surprise!

February – April:

Don’t really remember much besides painfully dragging my morning sick and ever-growing butt to work, then coming home and laying on my parents couch. Pretty sure I wore the same sweat pants for this entire time frame.

May – September:

The morning sickness finally faded, and I continued to grow a baby. We found out it was a boy. Jeremy managed to return from overseas just in time to witness my inability to get out of bed without push. We celebrated our second anniversary (yay!).

October:

Titus was born! He’s adorable. I’ve blocked out most of this month because I hope to actually want to have more children in the future. It seems imperative to forget the delivery and those first six weeks if one wants to have more children.

November – December:

Jeremy, Titus and I moved back to Tennessee. We celebrated our first Christmas together by ourselves. Rang in the New Year new-parent style by drinking some sparkling cider and falling asleep before midnight.

Well, there’s 2014 in a nutshell. I’ll probably circle back at some point and talk about some of that in more detail and with photos. But at least, I’ve brought myself up to current day. I find that having a conversation with my 3-month-old baby doesn’t have quite the therapeutic effect that talking to human adults does, so I think it will benefit my sanity to write a little more frequently than last year. Unfortunately, nap time is upon us, so my 2014 recap is finished.

The World Wide Warzone

6 Sep

It’s a been quite awhile since I posted last. I’d like to say there’s a good excuse, like ‘my laptop is broken’ or ‘I got a new job’, but I bought a new battery for that ol’ dinosaur of a machine and my job has only given me more hours during the day of which I’m online. My real excuse is that Jeremy and I moved to a new apartment with free cable, and boy do I love me some tv.

Anyway, like I said before, my job affords me quite a bit of free time during which I catch up on news and special interest stories. I never cared for reading the news much. I know that’s ignorant of me to say, but after how much I’ve read about rape, murder, and pending war, I miss my days of ignorant bliss. What I’ve found the most disturbing though is not the content of the news so much as the comments left after it. I like to believe that most people will surprise you with kindness, but those people are NOT the ones leaving comments on message boards. I’m shocked by what people write. I read an article by a mother sharing a parenting experience, which was replied to with people suggesting she should have been sterilized before puberty. Who says that?!

My mother never said the classic, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” Lots of other people’s mom might have, but my mom said, “Mind your business.” Sure, this is America, where everyone can state their opinions because its our government-given (not God-given…I’m pretty sure the Bible has quite a bit to say about keeping your tongue in check) right. But if you don’t have anything remotely helpful to say to someone and you’re only result is straight offense to not only the writer, but often an entire group of people, why not just keep it moving? What happened to constructive criticism? What happened to loving responses? If you’re ever in the mood to be offended by broad, hateful statements about race, religion, politics, sex, marriage, or pretty much anything else. The deterioration of our culture can certainly be found on message boards.

On a lighter note, I have found this blog-vent very therapeutic, and I plan to go home and work on the blog post I started at the end of June with my dip-dyed shorts. Also, Christmas is coming and I’m ready to load up on yarn and other goodies to start my multitude of homemade gifts.

Eyebrows: The Window Treatments of the Soul

1 Jun

There are two types of people in this world: those with immaculate eyebrows and those without. Most of the time, I tend to lean toward the latter. I think I pull my tweezers out about every two weeks or so. However, lately I’ve found myself with an excess of time on my hands, so I decided to shape them up a bit.

To be perfectly honest though, my real motivator was meeting someone who had a little shag in the brow bone region. I spent a majority of our interaction staring at the excess hair. Kinda made me reevaluate my own facial situation. I mentioned it to Jeremy and he just chuckled in the kind way that he does, but deep down I know if he should see said person again…he’s gonna notice the brows!

Anyway, back to the matter at hand. Eyebrows! If eyes are the windows to the soul, eyebrows are the window treatments. And window treatments don’t just accent a window; they pull a room together. My momma always told me that if your hair, make-up, bangs, ears, nose, etc are just not working…the problems is your eyebrows. (And if you happen to have dark hair, you might want to double check your upper lip region isn’t to make sure you’re not rockin a ‘stache as well.) So my rule of thumb is that before I make any changes with hairstyles and bangs, I do a little eyebrow maintenance.

Now, for those of you who prefer to do their own eyebrows like me (I’m cheap and not very trusting), there’s a few things to take into consideration. For one, there’s waxing versus tweezing. Waxing is soooo much faster and cleaner, but it’s easier to mess up and lose a chunk of eyebrow. Tweezing is more precise, but doing a good job is painfully slow. I used to be an avid waxer, but after I once spilled my wax in the carpet of my college dorm, I decided tweezers were necessary until I own my space. One thing I recommend when tweezing is to find natural lighting; it makes it easier to see all the tiny hairs.

Another thing to take into consideration is size and shape. Thick, neat eyebrows are the trendy thing to have right now. Unfortunately, not all of us grow luscious brows to start off with, but there’s also powder and brow pencils to fill in empty space. My eyebrows have a natural arch, so they’re easy to shape. But, they’re not all that thick, so I tend to add a little pencil (sometimes with a tint depending on my current hair color). You can’t really say one particular combination of shape and size is perfect for everyone. For example, I have one sister who meticulously plucks and draws thick (and I do mean THICK) dark brows on everyday, and it totally works for her. My other sister tried this once and all the baby forest animals and small children went running and screaming to safety. Ultimately, find something that works and stick to it. However, I should warn you, if you go for the thickness and it has to be drawn on, you’ll have to do it all the time. Otherwise, you’ll miss a day and people will ask you if you’re alright and say how tired and distraught you look.

The moral of the story here is that eyebrows matter. They can totally change your look. If ever you are feeling a little dumpy, grab your tweezers! A transformation is just a few plucks away.

Putting away my Precious Boots

29 May

Over the long weekend, I finally got a project going that I’ve been meaning to start since last November. It really all started when we moved into our tiny apartment with a pretty pathetic excuse for a walk-in closet. I’d dreamed of the day when I’d have my very own walk-in, so I was a tad disappointed to see that my new closet was more of a stand-in. Regardless, I had a ton of shoes to get in there, and my boots were sagging all over the precious floor space. So I went to Walmart in search of…Pool Noodles! Of course, they just looked at me like I was nuts, because why would they carry pool toys in the winter? So a few days ago, the pool noodle display caught my eye. So I got my boot stuffers just in time to put my boots away for spring.

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My husband cut them into quarters for me. He jumped at the chance to get to use his good hunting knife in the house. (You could definitely cut these with just a box cutter or scissors though.)

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Naturally, I had to make them fabulous. So I got out the leopard duct tape that I bought in November for this project. I ended up having to get a second roll, because I had to mail a few things and apparently I only have one roll of tape in my apartment.

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Now my boots are standing tall.

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